PART V
Rabbi Rifat Sonsino, Ph.D
In addition to our studies at the Hebrew Union
College, each student worked outside, on
a part-time basis, in order to make a few dollars. Most of us taught in Sunday
schools. I got a job at Rockdale Temple in one of the suburbs of Cincinnati.
Since I did not have a car, I depended on others who taught there to drive me
back and forth. In my third year, at a student lottery, I ended up with Meir
Chayim Temple, a bi-weekly congregation in McGehee, Arkansas. This was a small
synagogue in the middle of the South-about 30 families. Twice a month, on
Friday mornings, I used to fly to Little Rock, and then take a bus for “whites
only”!!! (This was terrible, but those were the days). My responsibility was to
lead services on Friday night and to teach on Sunday mornings. I was also asked
to join the Rotary luncheons on Fridays. For this I was paid $75 per trip plus
expenses, enough to give me some spending money. In my fourth year, I went to
Temple Israel in Jonesboro, Arkansas (about 75 families), and for my last year
I went to Temple B’nai Israel in Kokomo, Indiana (about 100 families). By that
time, the stipend had gone up to about $150 per trip. It was in these
congregations that I learned how to function as a congregational Rabbi.
During the summer of 1962 I went to Europe, Israel and
Turkey. I was in touch with my family on a regular basis by mail, but had not
seen them in person. So, it was nice going back to be with Mom, Dad and Joe, my
younger brother. Mom, however, had other plans for me: she wanted to marry me
off. In preparation, she had already lined up a few candidates. In those days,
I was worth about $100,000 in dowry, a huge amount of money. The minhag
in Turkey was for the family of the bride to give a large sum of money to the
groom in order to make sure that he would take care of her in the manner in
which she was accustomed. The higher
the groom’s education, the higher the dowry. I could not believe what my mother
had done, all with good intentions, of course. Yet, I broke her heart when I
refused to see any of the candidates, arguing that I would be in Turkey for a
short time, and could not possibly make a lifetime commitment to anyone, no
matter how wealthy or how beautiful. My mother and, they tell me, the expectant
brides, were disappointed. After a short visit, I left Turkey and returned to
Cincinnati.
My social life at the College was rather poor. I did
not have a car- a major disadvantage- and, therefore, had to depend on others
for double dating. Furthermore, I was a foreigner, who most likely would have
to leave the country for some God forsaken place. The scholarship I received
obligated me to serve a progressive congregation outside of the States for a
period of two to three years. In those days, what Jewish girl would, in her
right mind, leave America, the goldene medina, to go to a third World
country? Once in a while a group of us tried to date women from the University
of Cincinnati‘s SDT sorority (Jewish). However, it had a reputation of being a
place where girls were “seldom dated twice.”
Though many of my friends ultimately met and married wonderful women from this
sorority, I did not. So, I spent most of my time, either thinking about girls
(Remember, I was about 28 years old) or,
most productively, studying, because I knew that this would secure my
future.
Next: Leaving Cincinnati
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